<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META http-equiv=Content-Type content="text/html; charset=US-ASCII"> <META content="MSHTML 6.00.6000.16735" name=GENERATOR></HEAD> <BODY id=role_body style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #000000; FONT-FAMILY: Arial" bottomMargin=7 leftMargin=7 topMargin=7 rightMargin=7><FONT id=role_document face=Arial color=#000000 size=2> <DIV>In receipt of the October 2008 Sput, one correction: the geyser shown on page 37 and identified as Ragged Geyser is in reality "Jagged Spring." The real Ragged is the smaller, round feature a few feet west of Jagged. Very nice photo, by the way; far better than any I've managed to get of the thing.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>In reading the October Sput, I find the Sojourner's item of interest. Nice that he attempted to (again) clarify a few geyser terms. It reminded me of the "Physical Principles and Constants of Geysers" and perhaps now is a good time to remind people of them.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>Scott Bryan</DIV> <DIV>-----------</DIV> <DIV>Physical Principles and Constants of Geysers</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>1. Universal Law of Gravitation -- What goes up must come down-wind.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>2. Function of Aberration -- Subsequent activity always differs from that observed in the course of a formal study.</DIV> <DIV>Extension 2a -- The greater the detail within a published report, then the greater the future aberration.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>e. Exclusion Principle -- Truly great events always occur somewhere else, or at night, or both.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>4. Absolute Zero Factor -- The effective temperature reached during any interval that is longer than average approaches the ultimate minimum possible temperature. This law is most commonly enforced at Grand Geyser and Beehive Geyser.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>5. Grammaticus Factor -- The most spectacular eruptions occur during miserable weather and while the sun is behind a cloud. Note the relationship between this and the Absolute Zero Factor. (Named in honor of Saxo Grammaticus who, while observing in Iceland, never saw a sunlit eruption.)</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>6. Uncertainty Principle -- The attempt by a geyser gazer to decide on a future destination, often experienced at the Lower Hams parking lot. Also known as the Strasser Conundrum" because of the oft witnessed conversation: "Do you want to go to Grand or Great Fountain?" "I don't know."</DIV> <DIV>Extension 6a, Leeking Parameter -- Following the belated decision due to the Uncertainty Principle, the fact that one must move at a high rate of speed in order to achieve a new destination "in time."</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>7. Mass-Lifetime Relationship -- that lifetime (that is, the length) of an eruption interval is directly proportional to the cube of the number of geyser gazers present.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>Extension 7a -- If all members and associated of The Geyser Observation and Study Association are present, then the length of an interval shall be infinite.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>8. Mass-Height Relationship -- The height of a geyser, as expressed in verifiable terms, is inversely proportional to to the square of the number of geyser gazers present (expressed as mass).</DIV> <DIV>Extension 8a -- While the true height of a geyser decreases with the number of geyser gazers present, the reported height of the same eruption simultaneously increases by an incalculable factor.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>9. E = m c-squared -- The total energy expended by a group of geyser gazers is equal to the number of gazers (expressed as mass) multiplied by a geometricized concept of an anticipated event. Most classically exhibited at Fan & Mortar Geysers (or recently, at Giant Geyser).</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>10. U.F.O. -- Acronym for "Unidentified Functional object" and nearly obsolete in modern use, an erupting feature whose meaning or even whose identity as a true geyser is open to question, debate, argument, screaming and shouting. Also variously known as Sput, Rocco Object, Thing Over there, That Hole, and so on.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>11. Accepted Name -- A word or phrase used in the identification of a thermal feature without the benefit of extended study by a formal Names Committee of people who don't necessarily know anything about the feature itself, and who thus formalize a meaningless or inappropriate name. Often employed so as to confuse the record of activity, thus enabling future geyser gazers to conduct their own studies without having to worry about whether or not their results are in accord with earlier results.</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>12. Inverse Square Law -- A judgement bearing on virtually all geyser gazers, other than myself, and thus needing no further definition.</DIV></FONT><BR><BR><BR><DIV CLASS="aol_ad_footer" ID="28b8e405fa67e1d1e3bdd496466a3afa"><FONT style="color: black; font: normal 10pt ARIAL, SAN-SERIF;"><HR style="MARGIN-TOP: 10px">Plan your next getaway with AOL Travel. <a href=" http://travel.aol.com/discount-travel?ncid=emlcntustrav00000001 ">Check out Today's Hot 5 Travel Deals!</a></FONT></DIV></BODY></HTML>